Master your Destiny:
How to Change Habits and Enjoy the Process
© 2000, Roger Haeske
Over the last 13 years I've transformed myself from a negative, insecure, and average person, into a positive, self-disciplined, and goal oriented one. I've eliminated many of my limiting beliefs and attitudes learned in childhood. I've established many positive habits. I've even learned to enjoy reading, studying and working, things I hated when I was a teenager.
You could say I've become a professional changer. My life is proof that someone can totally change in a positive way. The biggest key I've found in making changes was to develop such a strong desire for changing that change became effortless and automatic. This strong desire for the positive state provides the necessary will power and self-discipline to make changes easily.
It always irks me when I meet people who think that a person's past equals their future. These people don't believe in the concept of self-improvement and this concept is what my life is all about. Most people have no clue that their only limit in life is in their imagination. If you believe it you can achieve it.
The initial thing that motivated me to make radical changes, was my discovery and realization of, "The Force; the Creative Power." My immersion in the pure power, light and love of The Force was a life changing experience. In one day I became a new person with new priorities. This by the way, is the first technique.
If you want to be something greater than you are you need a higher cause or love to serve. Many people find that they can be extremely productive if they are helping a friend. When it comes to doing their own projects they never can seem to get motivated enough. For many years I've wanted to get into the self-improvement field but wasn't motivated enough to be really productive. When I decided to do my own web site, I finally had a vehicle to serve a higher cause. Then I started dropping all sorts of time wasting activities and became much more productive. My web site is like my own child and I want to do everything I can to serve it. Now by serving my web site I can serve thousands of other people who find the information on it useful.
Some people say they lack the motivation to make changes. That is really the key. I've been able to change because I've developed an intense desire to do so. You must do the same thing. All humans are able to make changes and they regularly do. The problem is that many of the changes are for desires that take them away from their dreams. Most people I've found simply have not developed the belief in their own power to change negative patterns. That is probably because they don't know a good technique that they can use any time they want to make a change.
So the first step is to find a cause or a purpose higher than yourself which is in alignment with your dreams. Now if you don't already know what your higher calling is I suggest you get a copy of "Super Achievement," by Dan Lee Dimke at the Superbeing Bookstore. This audiocassette program goes into many techniques of finding your ideal work as well as giving tremendous strategies to maximize your success in life. I highly recommend it.
The next technique in Controlling Desire is to link pain and displeasure to the bad habit and to link pleasure and happiness to the desired behavior. One of the things I do to create a desire for change is to read a motivating book on the subject I want to change. An example is changing my diet. Recently I decided to do an experiment. I wanted to see if I could develop enough desire and willpower to start eating a 100% raw food diet. If you haven't tried this it is extremely difficult to give up addictions to cooked foods. When you give up cooked foods you realize that you were as addicted to them as if you were doing drugs. Cooked foods are extremely damaging to health and also extremely addictive. For more information on the raw food diet visit my Radiant Health Program.
Here is what I did. I bought a book by a person who is a prominent promoter of the raw food diet. He eats only raw and natural vegan foods. The book, by the way, which I highly recommend is, "The Sunfood Diet Success System," by David Wolfe. In the book, the author explains the many benefits of eating a raw diet and the extreme perils of eating the disease ridden cooked food diet of most of mankind. (By the way changing my diet has been the number 1 self-improvement strategy I've ever used.) As I read the book I linked the idea of the pleasure of experiencing the wonderful benefits of the raw food diet in my mind. I pictured myself needing less sleep and being more productive, things I've been trying to improve for a long time. Then I linked pain to eating cooked food. I knew from my own past experience that cooked food caused disease in me. So now I really associated in my mind as much pain and disease as possible to eating cooked foods. I even linked up the idea that eating cooked foods was like taking drugs. This worked well for me because one of my primary values in life is not to take drugs. Another primary value for me is to do anything I can to be as healthy, happy and long lived as possible. (Your values have a tremendous effect on your ability to make changes.)
Now I had problems changing my diet because I had to deal with my cravings for cooked food. So I developed a special visualization. I call it the inoculation technique. Anytime I had a craving I'd simply visualize all the pain I associated in my mind to cooked food. You have to reinforce your pain and pleasure links many times because desire can overtake you when your cravings are the strongest. You'll start to rationalize that your old habit wasn't so bad after all. Part of the reason we continue in negative habits is that we rationalize that on some level they are necessary in our lives.
I have some good news for you. If you stop indulging a habit for just a short time your desire for it will go away. At first you have to use willpower and the process of linking pain and pleasure to the behaviors you want to change. After a while, this new pattern becomes a habit. Now you're a changed person. You still have to watch out for the lingering desire. Your negative desire might try to tell you it's ok to smoke just one cigarette or to have a social drink or to eat a whole cake by yourself. That is when you need the inoculation technique. You must reinforce your reasons for making the changes. You have to see in your mind how much better off you've become.
Now lets write down two lists of the habits that you want to change. These habits can apply to anything at all you want to change. On the first list write down all the pain now and in the future that a particular habit is causing you. What will your life be like 5 or 10 years down the road if you don't change your ways? Take the time to get your emotions involved with this list. Try to experience the pain of having a heart attack because you didn't stop that habit of eating a bag of potato chips every night. This is a Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) technique called future pacing. Pain is the greatest natural motivator to change. All your are doing is taking control of pain so that you can make a change before the real pain sets in. Heck, if you don't change soon enough you may not be able to change back-it may be too late.
The next list is your pleasure list or your ideal vision list. Here you'll write down all the pleasure you'll gain from your new positive habits. You'll follow the same procedure as above, by getting emotionally involved and using future pacing. Imagine how much money you'll earn by scheduling your day for your most important tasks as they pertain to your future.
(To order the complete audiotape visit Our Store. The techniques I've given so far are very powerful, but many times they are not enough to make the change last. The complete audiotape has many more techniques to help you make changes and therefore, master your destiny.)